I did not emotionally eat once when I was in Europe…why is that?
I tell you why…
- Before I left I resigned my role as peacemaker in my family
- As my plane took off I imagined leaving all my stress + worry on the ground
- My heart strings were not being pulled
- I had achieved my dream of going to France
- I was committed to pleasure, laughter, delicious food, good wine, falling in love, improving my french and enjoy my life
Mid way thru the trip I paused and looked at my face in the mirror and I genuinely looked happy and even more importantly I felt happy. I commented to the gals on the tour that I had forgotten what it felt like to be so happy. Now; I am not saying that I haven’t felt happy in my life cos I have. This was a happy feeling that came from the core of my being and bubbled up and out of me…like champagne!. I sparkled from the inside out.
How had I gotten to that place tho? How had I gotten so bogged down in caring for others but not myself, I was swamped with needing to be ‘on’ all the time, stressed but keeping a lid on it, not speaking up to those who I am no more than an option to, nice when I want to say “f-off”, I keep on keeping on, being stoic, smiling when I want to cry, keeping the peace, swallowing my tongue, being politically correct when I want to be honest. Aarrggghhh! So on and so on and so on…
Whatever and however it came to be is done and dusted cos i have an opportunity to change things. All I know now is that I want to experience that feeling of happiness more in my daily life.
I knew this trip would change my life – I just didn’t know how it would.
My love affair with emotional eating had cooled off to polite strangers when I began to delve into RAW food. But in times of stress we hooked up and spent some time together.
I believe in my heart that women push our needs down to the back of the line, we feel guilty if we take time out to nourish our bodies + soul. We ignore the very things that nurture our feminine spirit. That m’dear is learned….and you can unlearn it…
If our needs become our priority and we are responsible for taking care of them on a daily basis would we then need to self soothe with wine and chocolate? Needs are often very simple such as having a bath with candles, going to a movie with a friend, catching up with gals for dinner, date night, the art gallery on a rainy Sunday or saying NO to putting one more thing on your over committed calendar, sleeping in, having the night off from cooking, someone else cleaning up after dinner….the list is endless!
What do you need today? I knew what I needed today and it was to stay home and potter around. Like really how simple is that? But the key was to listen and follow…regardless of how simple or silly it may be.
I have been home two weeks and have started craving comfort food. Instead of eating I asked “what am I really hungry for”? I was still jetlagged and needed more rest.
I could feel my agitation, I could hear the undercurrent of frustration and impatience in my voice and I wanted to be alone. This is the bodies way of telling me to TAKE CARE OF ME.
If you are an emotional eater and want to lessen it’s hold on you…. try:
- Adding more self care into your life
- Listen, feel, breath and trust
- Book a retreat + take a sabbatical from being everything to everyone
- If you eat comfort food as a ‘treat’ then make some sweet treats to take the edge of
- Give yourself what you are really hungry for….It may be love…..
xSusanne
Beautiful blog mon amie…. and you looked ‘alive’ on the tour, you radiated… keep going xoxoxo
I felt so amazingly radiant and even better …..happy!
Now to keep it up!
xsc